Big….mouth

I went to the dentist today for my bi-annual cleaning and, as the hygienist cleaned my teeth, she asked a lot of questions. This is one of my favorite types of conversations, where one person talks and I have no opportunity, at all, to reply.

“Did you have braces? Do you have sensitivity? It looks like you’ve been grinding your teeth. Have you? I can tell you have because of the line on your gums and the slight receding. Open big. Does it hurt to open? No, OK. Wow, you have a small mouth and big beautiful teeth – no wonder you needed braces.”

After the cleaning – no cavities on my big beautiful teeth in my small mouth – she applied the flouride. I always forget about the film this leaves on my teeth for the rest of the day – one more stressor to grind my teeth over later.

Hungry, I headed to a bagel shop for something soft to eat (no crispy or hot foods or drinks when flashing the flouride film). I ordered a soft egg wrap and, as I sat trying to carefully eat my meal, one of the employees returned from the back of the shop with a tissue in her hand. “Check this out! Can you believe it?” All of the employees gathered around her – some laughed, others backed away. “Seriously, it is so big. I can’t believe it came out of my small nose. I knew something was up there but I had no idea it was this big. Crazy.”

Crazy is right booger bitch. I am trying to eat a soft wrap with my big teeth and small mouth and the big booger from your small nose just ruined it for me.