There are a couple of ‘things’ in life that are/I’ve dated. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not jaded. In fact, if I had a dating mantra it would be, “Dated not jaded.”
It does seem, however, that dating certain people has certain consequences – i.e., prostitution stings and treadmills. There are also the very common consequences:
Dated and incubated (best hope it’s not twins)
Dated and debated (aka, fought a lot)
Dated and hated (goes without saying)
Dated and related (typically reserved for families in Kentucky)
Dated and arbitrated (loans, property, gifts – all sought after)
Dated and associated (coworker, neighbor, best friend’s sibling)
Dated and weighted (you know this relationship – the one that weighs you down, literally and figuratively)
Dated and baited (this may not always be bad if the bait doesn’t later become an item to arbitrate)
Dated and tailgated (stalkers)
Dated and crated (this typically happens later in life when your partner dies)
Dated and ornated (trophy girlfriend – may always be engaged and never married)
For the most part, I’ve only experienced a couple of Lifetime Television appropriate relationships. The best way to know if that is happening to me is to watch what equipment I’m using at the gym. If I’m using the treadmill, it should be obvious, I’m dating someone I shouldn’t. Which I refer to as “dated and abating.” If the person is really bad for me, and if I still had my prostitution sting heather greys, I’d be wearing them while running….away from them, on the treadmill.