Last night was the big “Back in the U.S.A.” party in Vegas and it was crazy! We played a drinking game called “Kings” and it has been a LONG time since I’ve done that….at least 24 hours. This is a game everyone must play at least once and strive to be the “Question Master.” It really is the best card to play!
Speaking of playing, there was a little bit of that going on at the party as well. Wouldn’t be a party if there weren’t any players. One fine chap, who we decided to call Dudley-Do-Right, could have actually been called Dudley-Do-Everyone. Not because he did, but because he could have. The women were smitten!
As the night progressed, the music got louder, the dance moves got crazier and the inhibitions were lowered drastically! Guns N’ Roses started playing and it was on! Being that we were at the Oasis Manor, there was a pool on the premises and with a pool comes a pole. Let the pole dancing begin. Word of advice: if you’re going to attempt pole dancing, it is probably best if the pole is actually attached to something.
After blowing my knee out (which I got to view later via one of the many videos taken of the “Axel Rose Pole Action”), I went to find CounterCat (the friend formerly known as “Cher”). She was crawled up in a ball, fetal position (maybe it was the “chapstick” that inspired this position….or the alcohol), on the bathroom counter.
I decided to track down Dudley-Do-Right, because his job is to help damsels in distress, so he could help me get CounterCat “off the tracks” and up to her bed. I found him, surrounded by his harem and said, “Yo, America, just because you served your country does not mean you need to serve all of the American women. I do, however, need you to help me get CounterCat off the bathroom counter.” In typical Dudley-Do-Right fashion, he swiftly obliged (and, yes, he has a “twinkle” on one of his teeth when he is in rescue mode).
When we returned to retrieve CounterCat, one of the other party patrons told us, “She’s fine, carry on.” She did appear fine. In fact, since the last time I saw her (five minutes prior) someone had put a lovely ribbon in her hair.
Dudley-Do-Right here, just wanted to say you were the life of the party and I hope that you come back down again real soon. Oh, the stripper pole will be fully installed before your next visit.
Ah, Dudley! What a treat to hear from you. Did you have a feeling I was tied to the railroad tracks somewhere nearby (not because I hitchhiked today or anything crazy like that….)? Thanks for inviting me to join in your celebrations and I would love to come back, especially now that I know the pole is attached to something. Will it still be in the pool house?