When Ice Cream Man and Sleepless requested a ride home from the airport after being in Mexico for the week Tree and I knew a good retrieval was in order. I owned a bolera hat, pimped out with red dingle balls, which seemed like a great idea, but I wasn’t sure what I could wear with it. As I went through my costume boxes I pulled out a possible outfit for Tree – bedazzled brown velour bell bottoms and a muscle tee with an eagle on it and the text “America.”
Although Tree liked the outfit, he had concerns the pants might be too hot so he started rummaging through one of my boxes and found three mumus. “We could wear these, floppy hats and sunglasses. It will be perfect!” he exclaimed. He was right. As he, Awkward and I waited at the baggage claim for Ice Cream Man and Sleepless to arrive we received several looks of interest. Awkward received the most looks, but he was donning facial hair. Our welcome home was well received by Sleepless and Ice Cream Man, but was exhausting for Tree and Awkward so they opted for a quick smoking break. As I observed them in their mumus, floppy hats, sunglasses and smoking cigarettes while perched upon a bike rack I realized we had a reality TV show in the making (again) – Honey Moo Moo!
After their smoke break we decided to grab a bite to eat. Tree and I remained in ‘character,’ but Awkward found it awkward, thus, left his mumu in the car. Craving some traditional American food after a week in Mexico, Ice Cream Man ordered cheese fondue. With the fondue pot in the middle of the table, it was difficult to see how much of our bread was actually getting in the cheese. “I can’t tell how deep it is,” I told Sleepless. “Sometimes I like just the tip,” Tree said while adjusting his mumu. “Not in my fondue!” Sleepless replied and added, “I want all of it in. None of this ‘just the tip’ business.”
Unlike Honey Boo Boo, we didn’t need subtitles for our viewers. The other patrons had been watching us since we paraded in and were, clearly, hanging on our every audible word. We ate until our bellies were full and, even then, we ordered dessert – cookies and milk. The thing about the mumu is you’ve got plenty of room for more food, but even when you’ve got plenty of room, sometimes your body just won’t allow another bite. As the famous toddler in the tiara once so wisely said, “When my belly hurts it’s usually because of gas or too many chicken nuggets.”