When push comes to shovel

We’ve had a lot of snow lately. So much, it took me three hours to shovel my driveway and sidewalks this morning. Granted, I get distracted along the way, taking pictures of miniature gnomes, making snow angels and taking coffee breaks – pretty sure the latter is required by the federal government.

While I was taking my legally required coffee break, my neighbor/lesbian girlfriend was shoveling her drive. I invited her to come over for a cup and she told me she needed to finish and get to work. “They won’t know if you’re shoveling or drinking coffee,” I advised her. Next thing I knew, he and I were sitting on my porch sipping coffee, breaking. Or is it broke? The English language is so difficult.

She only stayed for a few minutes and then returned to her task at hand. I was about to do the same when I saw a man taking his daughter to school, by pulling her daughter in a sled. I asked them to stop for a photo, they did, and then I asked him if he could take me to work in a few.

I eventually made it to work, sans a sled ride, and worked until half past five (seems like ‘half passed five’ makes more sense – another reason to take some English as a First Language classes). I then headed to the airport to retrieve Skiwi who was returning from a work trip. He greeted me with an in-flight barf bag full of cookies, peanuts and a pen from the hotel at which he stayed. “Thanks for the ride. The bag is just a small token of appreciation. I owe you. I’ll snowblow your walks in return,” he said. This was a good offer considering the time it takes me to shovel.

Before taking him home, we stopped at my house so I could retrieve a wig for a later event, and he shoveled my walks. We then attempted to make it up the hill to his house. Dirk is a good car. Unfortunately, he is like a fair weather friend. Just as I turned up the snow-packed hill he gave up and there was no getting up the hill. Skiwi hopped out and attempted to push me out, but all I did was burn rubber – and not in a racing way. Fortunately, the guy in the car behind us also helped push. Once I got moving Skiwi shouted, “Keep going, don’t stop for me.” I did so, Skiwi ran alongside the car, eventually opened the passenger door, and, while I kept driving, jumped into the moving vehicle. When push comes to shove(l), we do what we have to do weather a storm.