Scared of me

A few people have told me they are afraid of me. More specifically, they say, “I would never want to piss you off.” I think that is so cute because, truly, I’m not a mean person. That said, when I got in Calling The Dog’s car a few weeks ago for our solar eclipse road trip she handed me a book and told me, “I thought you might like reading this.” The book was titled Getting in Touch with Your Inner Bitch and is about “that integral, powerful part of you that is going unrecognized.” Calling The Dog was right, I really liked the book. Maybe people should be scared of me.

 

I know I am. Every now and again I’ll get up in the middle of the night to do something – usually eat – and I’ll see a shadow, my own, that completely frightens me. This is usually because my pillow has fashioned my hair in such a way that my hair shadow looks like Frankenstein’s bride. There are other times I’ll dash by a mirror, only to dash right back, experience fright, and say, “Oh, hell no, you are not wearing that!”

 

Other than that, I’m not too afraid of me. I guess sometimes I am afraid of something I might say or do, but most of the time I’m afraid of the consequences if they go unsaid or undone. If you find me scary, well, as Franklin D. Roosevelt once said, “the only thing we have to fear is fear itself.” As long as you fear fear, I can do what I do best, sit back, relax and scare you.

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