V.I.Pee

I’m at a place in my life where if I really want something, I do what I can to get it. If I need something, my determination increases and, if I’m on vacation, I add justification to the mix and I’m sold.

YummYummy and I were drinking with Good Eye Money Guy at the Lifshitz lounge when we inquired about hosting a private party. The bartender informed us it would cost $50/person, 25 person minimum. “$1250? We’ll do it tonight,” Good Eye Money Guy said and asked, “The three of us can drink enough for 25 people at that price, right?” “Duh,” YummYummy replied. As Good Eye Money Guy once said, “Your paycheck is my bar tab.” This night, our bar tab was his bar tab.

After our private party, YummYummy and I decided to take the kids to Empire State Building. “Do you need to use the loo before we head out?” I asked her like she was one of the kids. “No, I’m fine,” she confidently replied. So we hopped on the subway and made our way. By the time we got to the building we both needed to pee, badly.

We were approached by an outdoor sales rep asking if we would like to buy V.I.P. tickets to the building, allowing us an opportunity to go on the skyride and avoid the lines. “Will we be able to access a toilet, stat?” I asked. “Yes,” he replied. “Done,” I told him while handing him my credit card and, just like at the Lifshitz lounge, for $50/person, we were V.I.Pee.