Miss Beer Cart

Every now and again I work at a local furniture store. It really isn’t a big money maker for me, but the employee discounts make it worth it. The last time I worked I learned the discount would no longer be available to me or the other on-call employees. As a result, I will most likely terminate my employment there. The free hot dogs on Saturdays and free California rolls on Tuesdays, in addition to the low hourly pay, are really not enough reason for me to stay. As luck would have it, I spoke with a friend who runs a golf course and it just happens she needs someone to operate the beer cart. Life is good. I am soon to be the Beer Cart Girl (BCG).

This will open so many doors for me. In addition to making mad tips, I will have the chance of entering a Miss Beer Cart Golf Pageant. Looks like I’m going to have to buy a BCG visor and start working on my drive. Everybody knows its all about the long drive. Testimonials from previous pageants have really got me pumped, “As a participant in this great event from its inception I am speechless at the unbelieveable abilities of the contestents in their quest to become Miss Beer Cart.” – Tim Sachse

Speaking of beer, while chatting with coworkers at the furniture store today, someone mentioned Quagmire the Farting Ventriloquist. As the broom jokes were flying, I mentioned it might be interesting if he hosted a B.Y.O.B. party, primarily because people wouldn’t know if they should bring their own beer or broom.

5 thoughts on “Miss Beer Cart”

  1. I always have my broom with me. makes for a great conversation starter. I like to say: it’s so we can “sweep them out of office”… I don’t really know who “them” are, as an illegal colombian nationalista, I have no comprehension of your americatown. perhaps I need a civics lesson. could you answer a question or two?

    a) what is this california roll phenomenon? is it anything like being jumped and having you wallet taken from you, in california?
    b) where are you beer-carting? it’s hard for an illegal pre-colombian nationalista to find a cerveza in this ciudad. (illegally)

  2. I, too, believe brooms to be a great conversation starter and a must have at every occasion. One never knows when a request for leap frog with broom handles might me made. Plus, it is always a good idea to be prepared, especially for ‘them.’

    You are spot on with the California roll phenomnon and, beware, because they may start occuring more than one night a week.

    Ah, you want in on my beer cart gig. Meet me by ‘the rocks’ or just outside your office and I will provide you the coordinates.

  3. Congrats on the new position. I believe I know a few people who worked the golf course scene and I think the beers were the highlight of every shift for the “marshal”. I don’t recall them doing much with their lives though. Can’t say for sure that there is a future in it for you.

  4. Thank you. I, of course, have to first pass an alcohol safety class and get a food handler’s permit, but I’m hoping for the best.
    I do recall stories of the marshal and hope my time in the cart is more beneficial. They do have beer cart girl calendars and I don’t think they’ve got golf marshal calendars, so there is that.

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