Induced laborer

I’m having a hard time accepting my mini vacation is over. Now that I’m back to working 4/10s, I’ve decided we’ve got the concept wrong. Instead of working four ten-hour days, perhaps we should consider working four times a day for ten minutes. This is what most people do anyway, so making it standard practice seems like the logical thing to do.

Today was definitely one of those days that I wished I worked in a sleep study clinic or as a bedside reporter. No Action Jaxon decided to wake at four in the morning (sounds like That’s Not Chinese….maybe I should see if she wants a foster dog) and, after I let him out into the snow – yes, snow, I crawled back into my bed and attempted to fall back to sleep.

Just as I was entering dreamland my alarm went off. This got me thinking about “More than a feeling” and induced labor.

I thought about the Boston song because I have taken up listening to it on a daily basis and the first part of the song was spot on for me this morning: I looked out this morning and the sun was gone. Turned on some music to start my day. I lost myself in a familiar song. I closed my eyes and I slipped away. Unfortunately, when I closed my eyes I did not slip away and what I had was clearly more than a feeling – I believe I had a good old-fashioned hangover.

I thought about induced labor because I was in the fetal position, in my incredibly comfy and warm bed. I was just like a little fetus! And what keeps the little fetus warm? Amniotic fluid (also known as chapstick – see blog entry: http://grigiogirl.com/2010/02/thats-not-chapstick/). My bed is my amniotic fluid, keeping me warm in the comfort of my bedwomb.

There are a variety of reasons for inducing labor, two of which are being past the due date and the baby being sideways. As ahead of the times as I am, I’m not always on time and, let’s face it, I’ve been sideways my entire life. Hence my need for a labor inducer, aka alarm clock. I’m not too keen on this concept. Sure, it will help me arrive on time to work and avoid meconium, but it just seems so unnatural.

I mean, I’m GreenGo Girl. Going green means reduction, not induction (unless, of course, you’re talking about the Hall of Fame, then I’m all for induction). Nonetheless, I pushed my way through the amniotic fluid, exited the bedwomb, got showered and went to work. I am officially an induced laborer.

2 thoughts on “Induced laborer”

  1. sideways indeed. incidentally, meconium is either
    a) tarlike newborn baby excrement.
    b) on the menu at betos.

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