When living in the now means being stuck in traffic, I prefer to live in the then. This morning I was living in the then, thinking about the time my sister worked for a plastic surgeon. It was several years ago and, outside of being a guinea pig for the girls needing aesthetician training hours, I never benefited from the doctor’s skills.
I did, however, regularly suggest marketing ideas, such as buy one boob get one free, boobaway (similar to layaway – one boob now, the other later) or half-off specials. Unfortunately, they weren’t interested in my ideas – they were only interested in whether or not the acid level of the chemical peel was burning my skin. Needless to say, I haven’t been back and it has been years since my sister worked there.
Which is why the phone call I received this morning, minutes after living in the then, brought me right back to the now. “Hi, this is Heather from Dr. Morton’s office.” “Dr. Morton? As in the plastic surgeon?” “Yes.” “Weird. My sister worked there years ago and I was just thinking about it minutes ago.” “That is weird,” Heather replied. “Well, anyway, I just left a message on your office phone about your appointment on the 10th.”
After being brought to the now with Heather’s call, I drifted back to the then because of the coincidence of it all and, with the information about the appointment, I was thrown right back in the now. “Appointment? What appointment?” I asked. “You have an appointment on the 10th at 4 PM for Botox.” This really surprised me, causing a very strong brow furrow. “Wow, I didn’t make an appointment for anything there.” “Oh,” Heather said with a hint of embarrassment, “We must have put the appointment on the wrong patient account. My apologies.”
I thought to myself, with my brow still furrowed (classic thinking expression), “Was that a coincidence or did I just get Rogained with Botox?” Don’t act like you’ve never sent or thought about sending Rogaine or Viagra flyers to an ex. I shared the story with OregganO and we both decided I got Rogained and that it was a brilliant little trick. With the holidays upon us, I fully plan to regift. Botox, lip injections, liposuction, implants, and reduction – we’ll schedule what we feel is best for you.
Maybe whoever Rogained me did it for my own good. Maybe they knew I frequently live in the then and there is no better way to not live in the now than Botox. My expression will be timeless, or is it stuck in time? I get confused, and when I get confused, I furrow my brow, and when I furrow my brow, someone else sets me an appointment for Botox. Well played.