Two weeks ago Dr. BJ and I were invited to That’s Not Chinese’s house for dinner. She made soup and I brought homemade rolls. As the soup was disappearing from our bowls, the rolls were disappearing from the platter. I had about two bits of soup left, so I took the last roll (which was actually only half of a roll and it had been sitting there for some time) and thoroughly enjoyed my last two dips.
A few minutes later, Dr. BJ asked, with great disappointment and shock, “Who ate the last roll?” That’s Not Chinese totally rolled on me, “She did!” It was as if she had been waiting, with great anticipation, to share the intelligence she had gathered at the dinner table turned crime scene. I had no idea I was dining with the Last Piece Police.
About a week or so later, Passed The Sniff Test, OregganO, Dr. BJ and I were enjoying adult beverages and were a bit hungry. I brought out a relatively new package of Nutter Butters and, within about 15 minutes, there were only two cookies left. “I dare either of you to eat those last two,” I challenged OregganO and Passed The Sniff Test, “Dr. BJ and That’s Not Chinese are the Last Piece Police and neither one is afraid to call you out.” Dr. BJ confirmed this with a, “mmmm hmmmm.” Passed The Sniff Test smuggly picked up the second to last cookie and savored each bite (all two) while Dr. BJ observed.
The last cookie sat lonely in the large, close-to-empty tray for two long days. Lonely, that is, until OregganO had the courage to break it in half and share it with me. Within seconds of consumption we realized we needed to get rid of the evidence and did so by putting the tray in the recycling bin – yes, the one in the rear.
A few nights later, Dr. BJ and I were again invited to That’s Not Chinese’s house for dinner. On the menu: Sloppy Joe’s and tater tots. We had all enjoyed a lovely first serving of both when I decided I might like a few more tots. Upon entering the kitchen I quickly observed there weren’t many tots left. I took six – yes, I counted them – and returned to the table/crime scene with a full report, “If either of you want more tots, there are seven remaining.” “Good to know,” said Dr. BJ. “Are you serious?” That’s Not Chinese remarked, “You counted them?!?!” “Are you serious?” I retorted, “There is no way I’m getting implicated by the Last Piece Police!” “Mmmm hmmmm,” said Dr. BJ as he piled the last seven tots on his plate, “She (being me) is not going to let you roll on her – not again, anyway.”