After walking to the liquor store with That’s Not Chinese we decided we deserved to enjoy one of the bottles in our shopping cart. So, we popped the cork, grabbed a bag of potato chips and assumed our position on the stoop. Wine reduction, take one.
Just before we finished the bottle and That’s Not Chinese departed I received a text message from Live Longer, “Big Bounty and I are cooking and drinking. Want to join us?” I, of course, did and asked what I could bring. “Nothing or red wine. But I probably have tons in the basement.” I grabbed a bottle of red wine and made my way. Wine reduction, take two.
I arrived to find Live Longer and Big Bounty donning aprons, doing Julia Child impersonations and drinking wine. They immediately handed me an apron and a glass of red wine and the cooking shenanigans continued. Big Bounty decided it was time for the wine reduction, spoke in her very best Julia voice, and then took a sip directly out of the bottle before pouring it in the pan. So Julia of her. Wine reduction, take three.
About two hours into my arrival Live Longer told me, “I probably should have told you we aren’t eating any of this until tomorrow,” and opened another bottle of wine. Wine reduction, take four.
Fortunately, Tree and Awkward decided to join us for a glass, reducing our actual wine consumption, but adding to the reduction efforts. Wine reduction, take five.
By the end of the night we were probably, cumulatively, five or six bottles in and, having not really eaten, completely out. Wine reduction, fade out and end scene.