With the heavily tagged bag in my possession I headed to the home of what I assumed was an elderly couple to retrieve my luggage. I immediately phoned Q to apprise her of the situation.
“I’m headed to do a, what do you call it in the biz? A drop,” I informed her. “Did you check to see what was in their bag?” she asked like a good investigator. “No, but that would have been a good idea. With my luck it is a suitcase of drugs that DEA has been tracking.” I replied and added, “Oh well, I really need my retainers.” “You may need a retainer for an attorney,” she quipped. I had no idea one could pay an attorney with a tooth device. “That makes sense. There are a lot of crooked attorneys out there who need to straighten up and fly right. I know I do, I want straight teeth and my baggage bag – this is not flying right!” I replied.
I also kept YumYummy abreast of the situation. “Let’s hope he didn’t ‘sample’ your underwear,” she said. “I’m actually hoping to find him in my underwear, his wife in my bikini, and the Crown Royal open and on the counter.” “Better for you to have the Crown Royal, a guy in your undies and another guy in your bikini,” she advised. That’s true because that sounds like something Tree and FatGirl have done at my house so – a scenario with which I am very familiar.
Sadly, rather, fortunately considering the ‘players,’ unlike Goldilocks, nobody had been messing around with my belongings. I arrived to find an elderly woman, with a lot of plastic surgery and wearing a floor length white house dress, waiting for me at the door, my suitcase by her side. “We just got back from a cruise and have been relaxing all day. Haven’t even had time to look at our bags.”
First world problems. The only thing they’ve done today, aside from doing nothing, was sleep. Luckily, they weren’t drinkers, had good teeth, and didn’t appear to be drug runners. Actually, they were old and just got back from a cruise – there’s a good chance that heavily tagged left behind bag was packed full of pharmaceuticals. Damn. Glad I don’t the facts – I don’t need any extra ‘baggage.’