While driving to the frozen yogurt shop for dinner I received a call from Tree who informed me, “I’m making my famous BLTs.” “Who said they’re famous?” I asked. “I did,” he replied. “That sounds delicious. I’m planning on having mochi and raspberries in frozen yogurt for dinner,” I said. “Well you can have a BLT instead,” He told me. “How?” I asked. “Come on over!” he replied
I quickly re-routed and headed to the liquor store because I didn’t want to show up empty handed and I knew, if I asked, which I did, he would mention wine needs. As I perused the store I sent Tree a text, “At the liquor store now. It is packed tighter than my ass in my pants.” “Are you saying it’s got a hangover?” he quipped. Earlier that day I had informed him and anyone else who would listen that I have a hangover every morning and it is not from drinking, rather, it happens when I put on my pants. As I continued to peruse the store I ran smack dab into MiniMe. Awkward.
The awkwardness continued when I arrived at Tree’s house with a bottle of wine, two packages of chips and a half-gallon of ice cream (I needed some snacks for the drive and wanted to make sure my frozen dessert craving was satisfied). He was making my BLT, his aunt was watching TV and his mom was attempting to sleep off a cold in her bedroom. After only a few minutes of being there his aunt informed me she was heading to her bedroom as well. “Are you going to bed?” I asked. “I’m actually going to smoke marijuana, so if you notice any funny smells it is because of the weed. Do you want some?” was her reply. “No thank you,” I politely replied. “Awkward,” Tree commented and added, “See what I’m up against. No wonder I have problems.”
A few minutes later a guy who Tree met online stopped by to join us. While Tree’s mom and aunt were ‘sleeping’ in their rooms, Tree and I excitedly shared stories about our past and plans for our future (talk show) while the guy, who probably expected to be alone with Tree and arrived to see me – awkward, sat quietly in between us.
Not to let the awkwardness of it all – this day, my life – get in the way, I continued to enjoy my wine, the E! TV and, the videos Tree was sharing with me (not really with ‘us’) on his computer. As we bantered back and forth he received an alert that his battery was about to die. A few minutes into a music video the screen went black but the music still played. A few seconds later, silence. “I can’t believe you didn’t charge your battery before we came over. I always charge my battery for my guests,” I told him, finished my glass of wine and, like the computer, faded to black and headed home.