The run around

Opreggano and I love a good deal. When she found a yard sale with a twin-size captain’s bed, she called me and I, of course, told her I would be ready in no time.

When I opened the door, she looked down at my shoes and went Chelsea Lately on my ass, “Running shoes? Are you running somewhere?” “They’re not running shoes, they’rs just cute sneakers and, yes, I’m running errands with you.”

As we approached the yard sale, I asked, “How did you hear about this yard sale?” “It’s some sort of deal where they’re trying to make money to get their kids out of state custody,” she replied. The bed was front and center with a big sign on it that read, ‘FREE.’ “How much for the bed?” Opreggano asked. “We were asking $45, but now it’s free.” “I’ll take it!” she replied. “At this rate, they’re never going to get their kids back.”

We needed a truck to retrieve the bed, so we returned to my house, grabbed the truck, and decided to hang ‘MISSING: Banana Bread’ posters around town as we made our way back. Unlike the time when Opreggano bought a treadmill, and the people selling it just stood there while she and I attempted to carry it down the two-story stairs, these ‘sellers’ actually lifted the bed into the back of the truck for us.

“Let’s get out of here, quick, before they change their mind about the price,” Opreggano told me. “Why do you think I wore my running shoes?” I asked her. “How did you hear about this sale?” I asked again. “I don’t know,” she replied. “Another reason I wore these shoes – you’re giving me the run around.” “You and those shoes,” she stated.