When Sleepless invited Oreggano and I to join her and Ice Cream Man for a boating adventure, we grabbed our SPF 50 and nearly knocked each other over getting out the door.
It’s been pretty hot as of late and we’ve been trying to drink a bit more water, so we both decided we were only going to drink water while boating. Once in the water and away from the dock, Ice Cream Man stopped the boat and asked Sleepless to conjure up some drinks for everyone. “What do you want?” she asked us. “We’ve got vodka, soda, wine….” Oreggano and I looked at each other, then at our water bottles, and then I told her Sleepless I’d take some vodka and Oreggano opted for the bottle (yes, the entire bottle) of Chardonnay. “Now that we’ve got our cocktails, let’s head to the swinger section of the reservoir,” Ice Cream Man suggested. “Wait, what?” Oreggano asked. “Yes, what?!?!” I repeated her question for emphasis. “Do the swingers really have a ‘spot’ here?” “Yep,” Sleepless confirmed. “Yeah, it’s all of the people from Treehouse,” Ice Cream Man informed us. Oreggano and I made eye contact, raised our fists and did the “Bam!” Bam, Right!?!? would be so proud.
Sadly, we never found the swingers. “It’s too bad really. We would have fit right in,” Oreggano told Ice Cream Man, “One man, three women. It’s pretty obvious you’re either a swinger or a polygamist.” “Or a pioneer,” Sleepless added, “It is pio-beer weekend.” It was about this time that we were approached by who we assumed were a gay couple on a nice Sunday boat ride. Unfortunately, we were wrong. It was two undercover cops and they were interested in what was in our cups. We learned a valuable lesson that day. We need to have a decoy cup or two on deck at all times. “Maybe one that reads, ‘For the police’ and another one that reads, ‘Not for the police,'” suggested Ice Cream Man. He then said to Oreggano and I, “I’m not sure if you two work out or not…..” “You’re not sure? Did you hear this?” Oreggano asked me. “Yes, I heard it.” “I knew when it came out of my mouth that I was saying it wrong. I was just wondering if you listen to music when you work out and, if you do, what you like to listen to,” Ice Cream Man tried to explain. “We are wearing bikinis and our bodies are very visible and you ask that question. Unbelievable,” Oreggano told him.
Also unbelievable was the fact that later that evening Wanted and I were sitting in VIP lawn seats for the Steve Miller Band concert. Even better, the concert was free. Although the show was sold out, several of the seats around us were empty. “I kind of like the fact that nobody is directly around us,” Wanted told me. “Yes, it is nice,” I replied and added, “but it does make it very difficult to drink other people’s wine if there isn’t anyone seated right next to you.” Probably best.
A few seconds later, a man and his wife sat in the seats next to Wanted and the man gave Wanted a glass of wine. “Nice work,” I congratulated her. When her glass was empty, he filled it up again. “I’m really impressed with your wine skills,” I advised her. “Now I just wish he would give me his brownie,” Wanted told me. It was as if he could hear our whispering because, not even a minute later, he threw the brownie in Wanted’s lap. So, we danced, danced, danced, and then ate the brownie and ran. Destination: Swingtown.