LaLa, D-Dog and I decided to go to a Pete Yorn concert. For those of you who aren’t familiar with Pete Yorn, well, I must admit, I’m disappointed.
His voice is amazing. I would give anything if he would just leave a message on my phone so I could listen to it when I’m feeling down and blue and don’t have time to use the work loo.
As soon as he started singing, LaLa was titillated, “I totally have a lady wood.” “A what?” D-Dog asked. “A lady wood,” LaLa reiterated. “Don’t act like you don’t know what that is.” “Oh, I know,” D-Dog replied.
LaLa was giving Pete her full attention and, in doing so, noticed he was wearing a wedding ring. “He’s married,” she said with great disappointment. “That’s not right,” I said, “They should totally disclose that kind of information on the tickets.” “Yeah,” D-Dog added, “Let’s go.”
“I wonder who he married,” LaLa pondered outloud. “Not sure. He did date Winona Ryder once,” I informed them. “Winona Ryder?” asked D-Dog, “The shoplifter?” “Yep, looks like she can steal more than just clothes. She has stolen several hearts,” I responded. “Pete Yorn, Johnny Depp,” said LaLa. “Beck, Conor Oberst,” I continued. “She’s dated some hotties. I’m totally going to start shoplifting.”
After the concert, I decided to do what I often do, Google things. I learned there is a catholic high school called Ladywood in Michigan and they have a ‘Spirit Shop’ with t-shirts, hats and, most importantly, seat pads. If I could steal a seat pad, I would totally have a lady wood, in more ways than one.