Guess what I’m doing….

S-Unit and I were talking on the phone the other day and she shared a story with me about her mom. “You know how my mom tells me I need to lose weight?” “No. How?” I ask. “She says, ‘I’m thinking about buying you one of those nice treadmills. The kind you can fold in half and put under your bed.'” I told S-Unit those treadmills aren’t so nice and if she needed confirmation, she should read Three Ts.

A little while later, I attempted to return a call to OregganO and my phone did as it has been doing lately, it called someone I spoke with several calls ago. In this case, S-Unit. After I figured out I had dialed the wrong number, she posed a quick question before ‘getting off,’ “What are your wearing?” I told her that was rather personal. She told me I was an asshole. I told her she was a suppository. She then told me I should start a phone sex career while I’m sick and make some cash to pay for my antibiotics. I thanked her for the advice and told her we would chat soon.

Speaking of things you put places, Skiwi also phoned me the other day and, before I could say hello, he said, “Guess what I’m doing.” I didn’t have a clue and wasn’t falling for that trap again. What is in the air? First S-Unit, now Skiwi. “I’m talking to you on my bluetooth. I still can’t figure out how you can hear me, but that’s a minor detail.” “I hate when people talk on those in public places,” I told him. “I can’t wait to be in a public place,” he said and then, in a slightly quieter tone added, “Sorry, I’m on the phone.” “What?” I asked. “That’s what I’m going to say to people while talking on this in public places. I’m going to point to my ear and whisper that. Very posh. Guess what I’m doing now.” “Still no idea.” “I’m trying on my skiing helmet. Fits great. Not sure how I’m going to push the buttons, but it fits. Also fits under my bike helmet. Lovely. Alright, I’m going to head out and try some other stuff. Try calling me later and ask me what I’m doing.”

I haven’t yet done that. I’m still basking in the visuals from these past two phone calls. I may call him later, when I’m in silk.