At the last minute, I was invited to attend a Tesla concert. As most know, I have a hard time saying ‘no,’ so my only question about the event was this, “Are we dressing up?” Luckily, I was going with the right people and we would all be looking glambandourous. I remembered Tesla being part of the late eighties music scene, but couldn’t exactly recall their ‘look.’ So, like all good artists, I researched my role.
Unlike many of of the heavy metal glam bands in the eighties, Tesla wasn’t and isn’t into make-up and tight LYCRA® or leather pants. They were and are, however, into jeans, t-shirts and hair. Tesla girls, similar to the girls featured in the OMD video, had big hair, wore tight-fitting shirts, skirts and were really good flirts. With this research in mind, I opted for a mini skirt, tank top, leather jacket, over-the-knee boots, a fauxhawk and planned to bat my make-up enhanced eyes like nobody’s business.
I arrived to find an ambulance and fire engine in front of the concert venue. “Shit,” I told Mini Sprinkle Donut, “I have a feeling they may be here for one of the band members.” “They are pretty old,” she replied. Luckily, that was not the case, and I walked into the venue to find the band on stage, sitting – this is their standard practice and a good way to avoid being whisked away in an ambulance.
I found One And Done and Returned Wranglers in a crowd of fans dressed to a Tesla ‘tee’ in t-shirts and jeans. As they were singing with the band, one of the extremely excited fans turned to us and said, “I think I may have filled my diaper.” Gross. Checking one’s pants to make sure they are appropriate for an event is one thing, checking them because you may have filled them is quite another.
The concert continued, One And Done and I continued to pretend to know the words to the songs, and Returned Wranglers continued to tell us, “I love these guys!” As they were chair dancing, singing ‘Signs,’ and sounding really great, I concert-whispered to One And Done, “I’m surprised they’re covering another band’s song.” “I know, right?” Turns out the reason they sounded so great is they were, in fact, singing their own song. I guess next time I should spend less time ‘checking pants’ and a little more time researching the band’s songs. Or, I can just stay in Paradise, Caught in a Dream about Little Suzi, take a little Edison’s Medicine and Hang Tough while waiting for a Modern Day Cowboy, Thank You.