It’s been a while since I’ve worked at the furniture store, so I decided to pick up a couple of shifts. One evening, while cashiering, a man and a woman – presumably husband and wife – approached me with two young adults – presumably their children.
“We’d like to pay for this,” they said pointing to their invoice. “Is there anything free with purchase today?”
I took a quick look around the office and replied, “Not today.”
At about this time, somebody farted. They both turned and looked at the young man.
“What?!?!” he asked and then began his denial, “It wasn’t me. I swear.”
“Barking spiders,” I said.
“Seriously. It wasn’t me. It was that old lady,” the young man said pointing to a blue hair who was slowly making her way toward the electronics area.
“Regardless of the source, that was free with purchase,” I informed all of them.
“I can’t believe you’re blaming the old lady,” the man said.
“Me neither,” I piped in. “An innocent old lady, somebody’s grandma, and you accuse her of crop dusting. Well, at least she isn’t fertilizing.”
As they walked away I apologized for only having free barking spiders today and, because I’m always looking out for the best interest of the customers, I provided a parting suggestion to the young man, “You may want to check your shorts.”
“For barking spiders,” the man quipped.