Met up with the parents for dinner tonight. I missed Pops’ birthday and would be out of town for Father’s Day, so I decided to take him and Mama out to eat. Being that Beaner’s birthday is a few days away, I invited her as well.
I had left the location up to Pops and he debated between Olive Garden and Red Lobster, “I like places that aren’t too crowded so I can hear the conversations.” He settled on Olive Garden. We arrived a little bit earlier than them and decided to have a drink and open Beaner’s birthday present. As we waited for them to arrive, we placed Beaner’s present – an ‘It’s Five o’clock Somewhere’ gnome, and some framed photos of us (actually just returning a borrow) in the center of the table. “We should really start bringing our own centerpieces to restaurants,” I advised her.
Pops and Mama arrived a few minutes later and were hard to miss because Pops was wearing a very festive shirt. At first I thought it was a Hawaiian type shirt, as they got closer, I realized the print was entirely hot dogs with mustard. “Nice shirt,” the server told him. “Thanks. $10.97. Walmart. They’ve got a great selection,” Pops proudly replied. Pops then told all of us (waiter included) about the various patterns and the fact that he owns all but one of them. “Tomorrow is El Capitan day,” he advised. Who needs days of the week underwear when you’ve got Walmart shirts?
“Do you guys have big plans for the evening?” I asked Mama and Pops. “Just hot doggin’ with mom,” Pops replied. “That sounds kind of dirty,” Mama interjected. “Oh brother. People can just dream on,” Pops said while brushing the comment/concern away with his bandaged hand. Our server approached the table around this time and I tried to egg Pops on, “Show him your injured finger.” “Yes, show him,” Mama got in on the game. Pops finally obliged, essentially flipped the server a large, gauzy, bandaged bird and said, “Sometimes I wish the bandage was bigger, like when I see my ex son-in-law, so he could really see it.”
The server agreed and walked away laughing and shaking his head. I’m sure after tonight he’ll want to gauze wrap his bird finger, throw on a $10.97 Walmart shirt and go out hot doggin.’ I’m not sure, however, whether or not he’ll be with his mom.