As That’s Not Chinese and I were wine’ding down on the stoop, after a very exhausting day of deboxery, Tree and Awkward pulled up to join us.
“Heyyyyyy,” Tree exclaimed, waving as he exited the vehicle.
“Interested in a glass of wine?” I asked as the crossed they street.
“Yes!” was their swift and sassy reply.
Once on the stoop with us I noticed that they were both donning new Vans.
“Twin Vans. Very nice and very gay,” I said.
“Aren’t they cute?” Tree asked, rhetorically.
As they sat, Awkward got cold. I offered him a sweater, but he opted for a hoodie.
It was then that we got the grand idea to make a video of Awkward removing his shoes, putting on Tree’s shoes, then taking off his hoodie and putting on my sweater. Though deep in conversation with Tree, and not at all interested in our activities, That’s Not Chinese begrudgingly agreed to play the Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood theme on her phone while I shot a quick video. Awkward nailed it on the first shot!
“Pretty sure that’s going viral,” I told Awkward.
“I liked it. So far, I’m the only one who has liked it,” he replied.
“I don’t like it,” Tree smugly told us then returned to his conversation with That’s Not Chinese.
So Tree. He would have loved it if he was the one embracing some of Fred Rogers’ best work.
A little while later, after running out of wine and a few more ‘likes’ on our viral video, Awkward put his shoes and hoodie back on and everyone made their way home.
We definitely made the most of this beautiful day and, since we’re no longer together, I’ll type what I didn’t think to say, “Would you be mine, could you be mine? Won’t you be my gaybor?”