Live Longer’s exhausting day as a lay down comedian, in combination with all of the snow, resulted in leaving her car at my house and accepting a ride home from Ice Cream Man. The next morning, she showed up on my stoop with a shovel and a bag of her work clothes in her hand. “I was ready to help you shovel, but I see you already did. Oh, and I forget my car keys and my phone.”
I drove her to her house to retrieve the forgotten items and, as she exited the vehicle I advised her I would just put my hazards on wait. “You don’t have to,” she told me and then said, “Oh, wait, I guess you do. I need a ride back to my car.” When we returned to retrieve her car she exited my car, looked down on the snow covered road and said, “Uh oh, somebody lost their keys.” She picked them up and realized they were actually her keys. “Oops, they’re mine,” was her reply.
As I went to leave I realized I was high centered, which didn’t surprise me because Dirk is so low profile gets high centered on a candy bar. Not one to want to rely on others for help I rocked the gears until I was off the snow pile, looked both ways, and gunned it.
The next day, after attending a meeting, I returned to my car – which was parked on the street near our State Capitol – and noticed the snowplow had pushed a foot or so of snow into the side of my car. I grabbed my ice scraper, cleared it out as best as I could, and then attempted to pull out, all to no avail. My car slid back into a huge snowbank and, regardless of how much I rocked the gears, I wasn’t going anywhere. I realized shoveling out was necessary, thus, needed a shovel. I spotted a shovel at a nearby home, attempted to ask to borrow it, but nobody answered the door, so – being in close proximity to the Capitol – I exercised eminent domain and used their shovel to dig myself out. One hour later, the snowbank was no more and I gave leaving another go. Sadly, frozen slush had now connected with my rear tire. Luckily, I still had my Vivid Videos ‘welcome’ poster board in my trunk and I placed it under the tire for traction. With that, I was free.
I decided to leave the shovel and, as a thank you, my welcome sign.