I’m only one week into my early retirement and I’ve already received a comeback career suggestion from a former coworker.
“You should really consider some type of Super Dave character. Let’s start making the videos. You’ll soon be viral,” he told me.
“A stuntwoman who gets hurt on a regular basis yet maintains a positive attitude? I could do that. I’ll submit a records request to Chicago to get the footage of my poor footage a few years ago. That can be our first official video,” I replied.
“Which reminds me,” I added, “The other day somebody told me, ‘Don’t worry, you’ll land on your feet.’ I informed them I lacked balance so there is a good chance I won’t actually land on my feet.”
“True. It’s more likely that you’ll land on your shoulder, again,” he said.
“Regardless of how I land, I’ll need a few good stunts ready to go and, of course, I’ll need to find me an assistant. Are you interested?” I asked him.
“Sure. You can call me Kodak,” he replied and asked, “What shall we call you?”
“Furlough Femme?” I suggested.
“Appeals to all audiences,” he responded.
“We best get cracking,” I said. “I’ve only got six months of insurance and I can guarantee that these daredevil tricks are sure to not land me on my feet.”