Like most employed people, I have a back-up plan in the event I get canned. Initially, I’d like to do what a young laid-off teacher in Illinois did -not spend my days filling out applications; rather, I’ll just ride my bike and drink coffee; preferably at the same time.
When I get bored with that, and when my bank account really starts to dwindle, I intend to do as I did as a young child – live off of canned foods. I am, however, planning to take it a step further and attempt to make a living off of canned foods.
This idea presented to me while at a posh country club with coworkers. As we dined, we discussed who cooks at home and what defines cooking. I shared a few recipes with them from my childhood – canned cream of mushroom was always a staple – and a few recipes I’ve recently concocted. “You can – pun intended – make anything with a few canned goods and frozen items. If you want to spruce it up, add cheese, which you can often get near the canned foods, in a box.” I shared a few ideas and, as they mocked me, I told them, “You won’t be laughing when I’m starring in my own viral sensation: ‘Canned’ or ‘Yes, We Can!’ or ‘I Can Cook’ or ‘You Can Cook Too’ or ‘Can Do’. The possibilities are endless.”
I’ve still got to work out the logistics, but I’ve no doubt I’m well on my way to stardom. As we left the country club one of my closer co-workers whispered, “I thought of a few other cans you can feature on the show, but didn’t want to shout that across the table.” “Oh, don’t think I haven’t thought about featuring my cans in the show. The camera shot will be from the neck down to the canned goods….on the kitchen counter.”