After Baby Q toppled down the stoop stairs, I figured we would be incident free for the remainder of the visitation. Not so. About 30 minutes before Q arrived to retrieve her we were discussing the idea of visiting the neighbor’s chickens and pilfering their tomatoes. Baby Q was pleased with this suggestion, so I ran to grab her shoes. That’s when I heard the thud and subsequent wailing. I busted back to the room to find she had fallen off of the bed and landed directly on her bum. I immediately assessed her for injuries – broken limbs and the like, held her for a minute, then asked what hurt. “My bum,” she replied. I took a look and advised her, “Uh oh, looks like you have a crack in it. Better get you an ice bag.” We then rounded up the ice bag from the day prior, secured it over her pants with a tea towel, and hurried over to the neighbors. Fortunately, we returned home prior to Q arriving – ice bag still in place and tomatoes ready to be sliced.
Immediately after Q and Baby Q departed, I headed to Live Longer’s house for a Labor Day barbecue. We were discussing various life matters, to include Alzheimer’s, and I advised them of a study that found being bilingual prevented people from getting Alzheimer’s. “Are you bilingual?” one of the guests asked me. “Not really. I only speak a little bit of every language – English included. Plus, with my family history, I’m bound to get it. That said, I’m learning how to say, ‘I’m screwed,’ in several languages, just for kicks,” I replied.
Later, we were discussing Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) when Live Longer’s husband advised us someone was OCM. “What is that?” Live Longer asked. “Occasionally Messy. OCM,” he replied, quite proud of the diagnosis he created. Like me, he’s not a doctor, but we would both play one on TV if asked. In the meantime, we’re just normal human beings who enjoy appearing knowledgeable and occasionally getting the facts wrong – would that be OCGTFW? For example, it turns out being bilingual doesn’t prevent Alzheimer’s, rather, it appears to make dealing with it easier. Oh well, nothing wrong with encouraging people to learn a language – doctors have an obligation to encourage enhanced living. Not so. I just checked the duties and responsibilities of doctors and that isn’t accurate. Like I said earlier, “Jag är Screwed. Je suis vissé. Ich Screwed. Estoy jodido. Ik ben genaaid.”