Yesterday, while looking for my car keys, I found two interesting objects in my purse. A set of utensils wrapped in a napkin and a sheet of ‘Alcohol & Pregnancy Don’t Mix’ stickers. I’m not quite sure how these ended up in my purse, however, I appreciate the generosity. I shared this finding with others and That’s Not Chinese informed me she also found the stickers in her purse, but no utensils. Very interesting.
The Responsible One was very envious of my newfound gifts, specifically the stickers. So, I offered to share them with her. In appreciation, she invited me to join her and Drink Whisperer on Christmas eve at a local bar. This year, she informed Drink Whisperer that they would be taking the ‘Christ’ out of Christmas. For her this meant no family gatherings. For him it meant she might be going to hell. For me it meant, mas party. For those of you who aren’t bilingual, mas means more. You’re welcome.
As she was telling me about the bar, she told me it has the word “‘Bout” in the name. “Really?” I asked, “‘Bout, Huh? Interesting. These are the contractions I don’t understand. Why contract if you are only taking away one letter and plan to replace it with a single quotation mark?” “Good point,” The Responsible One replied, “it doesn’t make much sense.” “Maybe it made sense when people were sending telegrams more regularly and every space and letter was tied to cost, but these days? I just don’t get it.” “‘Tis the season,” The Responsible One replied. “‘Tis ’bout time people started using ’tis more often in conversation,” I stated. “‘Tis true, ’tis true,” The Responsible One quipped.
Then I had an idea, which I shared with The Responsible One. “I’m going to start saving up the letters I drop when contracting and just use them periodically ahead of or at the end of other words. I’m pretty sure this is how Apple came up with iTouch, iPod, iPad, the lot of them. I’m going to do it, fo’ reals. I’m not ascared – people best start expecting contractions. I already have a credit balance from those few sentences. Join me?” “Let’s do it,” The Responsible One excitedly agreed (while banking a ‘u’ for later use), “’tis good stuff.” And now she has an ‘i’ for later use. Two for two. Well played.